Don't underestimate the person who doesn't like to talk.

I went to listen to a speech at the weekend. The topic was "Do introverts need to change their personality?" The speaker was a software entrepreneur and was relatively well-known in the industry. On the stage, he was wearing a black dress and a tall hat, plus...

I went to listen to a lecture at the weekend, the topic was "Do introverts need to change their personality?"

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The speaker is a software entrepreneur who is relatively well-known in the industry.

He was wearing a black dress and a tall hat on the stage. In addition, the lights in the hall were dimmed, giving people the illusion that he would change into a black man at a certain point in his speech. A magic trick, or a fire-breathing trick.

He first told a story, saying that he fell in love with a girl in the study room of the university. After countless struggles and self-mobilization, he mustered up the courage to hand the girl a small letter. Note: "Hello, can I be friends with you? I am the boy wearing a hat at the table behind you."

About five minutes later, the girl walked up to him and said softly: " I'm leaving, do you want to come with me?"

Then he said what he thought was the most classic thing he had ever said in his life: "You go first, I still have a question to answer. End..."

When the people in the audience burst into laughter, he cleared his throat and asked loudly: "Do you ever feel that introverts deserve to be unloved?"

< p>Then, he told a second joke, saying that when he first entered the workplace, the company organized a physical examination, one of which was a urine test, and each person was given a small cup.

He didn’t know how much he needed to fill, and he was too shy to ask the staff for advice, so he took it full.

There were many people taking physical examinations that day, and the corridors were crowded with people. He was too embarrassed to let the person in front of him give way, so he "squirmed" forward cautiously.

The doctor who received him at that time was an aunt. When he saw him holding a full glass, he asked: "Young man, are you here to toast?"

The audience again Laughing into a ball. He asked loudly: "Do you think introverts deserve to be laughed at?"

When everyone had laughed, he asked again: "Can you see that I am an introvert?" "Everyone shook their heads.

He said seriously: "Even though I stand on the stage and talk a lot now, in fact, I am beating gongs and drums in my heart!"

He said that he has been working for more than ten years. In my studies, the number of times I took the initiative to raise my hand to answer questions was zero, let alone express my love to girls.

In the first thirty years of his life, others labeled him as unactive, unsociable, and boring. He has also worried about this and tried to make himself more outgoing. After all, in this era of "crying children are fed by milk", he is also worried that he will lose some opportunities because of this.

However, in the process of trying to become extroverted, he also found that what those extroverted people did and said seemed to him extremely boring and awkward, and the complicated things that resulted were even more complicated. It was coming at him like a hail of bullets.. He couldn't escape, but he couldn't bear it either.

If introversion will lose some opportunities, then pretending to be extroverted will lose all happiness.

Until one day, the girl secretly told him that "she likes introverted and serious boys." Until the software he had been coding in the office for three months was bought by a big company at a high price. It wasn't until he checked countless information, modified the program countless times, and won a grand prize, and until the company he worked for alone became successful,

that he understood: there is nothing wrong with being introverted. The good thing is that he has no real ability!

The expansion and maintenance of your social circle is not based on the skills you praise others, but on what you can do for your friends and what you have done;

Competition in the workplace Strength does not depend on your talent for conversation, but on how much real value you have and how much RMB you can earn for the company.

Of course, we all have to admit that lively and cheerful people are indeed easier to like. Compared with the moldy person sitting in the corner, everyone will like the person who stands in the center of the stage, is eloquent, and A man who has both sides.

However, if you are an introvert at heart, pretending to be extroverted will have a copycat effect - you are like playing a character that is completely opposite to your own personality, and you are like wearing a suit. A piece of clothing that is seriously ill-fitting makes you unable to move and is exhausted physically and mentally. How can there be any happiness at all?

If you think it is happier to sit at home and read alone than to go to karaoke with a large group of unfamiliar people, then the consequences of forcing yourself will only be: you have not finished reading the book, and you are still embarrassed in the karaoke hall. To die.

You feel more comfortable hiding in the office alone, working overtime and eating instant noodles than going to a celebrity reception with your parents. The consequences of forcing yourself will only be: you hate yourself in the game world, you Your parents also hate you for not being able to take advantage of the situation!

Rather than jumping into the crowd and pretending to be one with the world, it is better to accept your introverted self. Then, exert your strength silently and bear it secretly.

When you make achievements and achieve something, others will say to you: "You are not an introvert, you are clearly an introvert!"

So, Whether introversion is an advantage or a disadvantage depends on how capable you are, just like whether "acting cute" is a compliment or a derogation depends on how you look.

While listening to this speech, I suddenly thought of Liu Zhuo.

Liu Zhuo is recognized as a loner in our university. Whether in class, self-study, eating or exercising, he always stays alone. If I hadn't seen him speak out in a debate with reason and emotion, I would have thought he was mute for a long time.

Usually I don’t see him raising his hand to speak in class. When we meet and greet him, he just nods symbolically.

When others were having a heated discussion in class, he would always stare blankly at the textbook without saying a word;When there were some unanswerable questions, he would lie on the table and write something seriously.

Of course, no one would think of him when selecting class cadres or selecting outstanding students.

Until the eve of graduation, when everyone was trying their best to increase the beauty, personality and thickness of their resume, his resume was still an ordinary piece of A4 paper;

When everyone was When he was thinking about what to wear for the interview and asking about interview etiquette and techniques, he still went to the library on time to study.

The result was beyond everyone’s expectations. He was the only one in the journalism class who was hired by a major foreign media. His trump card is his published academic papers, award-winning photography, translated short poems, novels, and more than 200,000 words of news reviews.

It turns out that while others were chatting about entertainment events, he was immersed in writing in-depth comments on the news events of the day;

While others were staying up late watching TV dramas and playing games. At that time, he was translating a collection of poems word for word;

While others were crowding into the crowd to take selfies during the holidays, he was holding a camera on the street to take pictures of various social situations;

While others were attending various gatherings shoulder to shoulder, he was chatting and laughing with several equally introverted but like-minded people...

It turns out that introverts also have extroverted talents, but they just can't be the same. People at different levels talk nonsense.

It turns out that being a loner is not always due to introversion, but may also be due to excellence, so one dares to be different.

It turns out that introversion is due to having special skills. Just like wild beasts always travel alone, cattle and sheep always travel in groups.

Wang Guozhen wrote in "Loneliness": People who are too beautiful are prone to loneliness emotionally; people who are too excellent are prone to loneliness in mind. This is because it is difficult for them to find a suitable partner.

Just like the sun is lonely, the moon is lonely, but the stars appear numerous and noisy.

In order to get rid of loneliness, people with weak wills look for comfort and stimulation; people with strong wills pursue excellence and enrich their personalities. Their starting point is the same, but their endings are very different. The former sinks because of loneliness, while the latter sublimates because of loneliness.

Introverts are actually more rational and cautious, and will not open their hearts casually just because someone hooks up with them and sings a few words of "Little Rabbit Be Good".

An introvert has his own back garden, filled with fragrant flowers and exotic plants, but he will not open it to outsiders easily.

Like-minded people can visit here, and people with similar tastes are allowed to visit occasionally, but superficial enthusiasm and formal excitement are refused entry.

I hope you won’t fight with anyone, because you have an overwhelming advantage in ability, so you don’t bother to fight, not because “you can’t fight with anyone”!

Many introverts are not introverted in nature, they just don’t want to talk too much with people who don’t talk to them.

Just like many seemingly extroverted people, in factHe is essentially introverted, but when he is in an environment he is familiar with and in a field he is good at, he becomes talkative. Such as Luo Yonghao.

Luo Yonghao always gives people the impression of being a "talkative" on the podium, but he calls himself a "very introverted person." He said: "When I attend a dinner party with more than five people, I will feel uncomfortable all over. After every dinner party, I have to read hard all day by myself to recover.

I remember before I went to New Oriental to be a teacher. , many people said to me: 'Lao Luo, you don't say a few words a day, how can you still go to the podium and be a teacher? Don't be ridiculous!' But I don't care, my introverted personality determines that I will not be Who says introverts can't be teachers if they are influenced by others?"

If you are an introvert, try to be more introverted, instead of forcing yourself to change your personality and causing internal injuries!

If you want to gain recognition in this utilitarian world and get the legendary "connections", what you have to do is to make yourself more powerful, as a way to reject those boring people and things;< /p>

What you have to do is make yourself more interesting to attract another group of like-minded interesting people.

As for the person who ridicules you with "You want it, if you want it, just say it. How do I know you want it if you don't say it?" Please continue to use your "language" towards him. Mysophobia". After all, it is impossible for a person with limited knowledge and low emotional intelligence to discern the real reason for your silence.

The best attitude towards life for introverts is: when the wind is strong, show the courage to go out against the wind; when the wind is small, show the patience to accumulate feathers and sink the boat!

This world is always like this:

Some people praise you for your connotation, and some people say that you are nothing more than that; some people say that you have personality, and some people say that you are too good at pretending; some people say that you are too good at pretending. You are very real, but some people say you are really hypocritical.

Introverts really don’t need to care about other people’s chatter, let alone envy their claptrap.

If you hesitate every time because of other people's words, if you feel depressed every time because of someone's disapproval, if you sigh every time because of other people's opportunism... …

Then you will spend your green years and get nothing except hesitation, depression and sighing.

This is the "little man's kindness" of time. It will slowly let you see the truth of life, but it will not give you any compensation!